No Excuses Episode 52: Jamie Bronstein on How to Love Yourself and Your Relationship

Spiritual psychology is seeing life through soul-centered eyes, changing the lens of perception, and rising above your humanness. Jaime Bronstein uses this psychology every day through her work as a relationship therapist and coach. In this Valentine’s Day special, she discusses the keys to a healthy relationship, trusting your intuition, tips for Valentine’s Day, and so much more.

Connect with Jaime on Social:

-Website: therelationshipexpert.com

-Instagram: @therelationshipexpert

-YouTube: Jaime Bronstein, The Relationship Expert

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A LOOK INSIDE THE EPISODE:

TM: What is a relationship coach?

J: I am trained as a relationship therapist, I am a licensed clinical social worker, I am a licensed therapist. So, with the coaching that I do, I feel like everything that I do is so unique. When someone asks, “What’s your style?”  I say “It’s the Jamie style,” because I mix my background in psychodynamic stuff like therapy, that clinical classical therapy, with my coaching, so it’s kind of a mixture. Coaching, compared to therapy, is more hands-on, what’s going on, we’ll visit the past, we don’t need to stay there too long, but we do need to heal it, and what can we do to move forward? What are your goals? What are your dreams? Then, I also bring in the spiritual aspects of; I have tools, I give my clients homework, I have them make a vision board, but it’s called an ideal scene. So, coaching is more like, here’s your homework, this is what we’re gonna do. I’m a person to stay accountable to, they stay accountable to themselves, and I don’t know if it happens faster than therapy but it’s more dynamic and more accountable. We’ll have goals and something that I work with is a 33 day process. Anything that you do for 33 days– quitting smoking, eating healthy, exercising more–  it becomes a habit. Whatever my client is working on, I’ll be like, “Let’s do this for 33 days.” It’s more like that, but also with the therapy stuff.

TM: What is your definition of a successful relationship?

J: First, I just want to say that when there is a breakup or divorce, it’s not a failure, it just means that it wasn’t meant to be and it happens all the time. It’s all okay. It  just means that those two people will find the right person for them. So to me, a happy and healthy relationship consists of really good communication, but not in the cliche way. I’m talking like, literally you don’t hold back. You speak your voice, you feel seen and heard, each person in the relationship is validating each other, they’re really listening. There’s a lot of fun in the relationship, there’s a good sexual part of the relationship, you feel peace in your heart, when you’re in this relationship, which that can be interpreted in all different ways. The opposite of that is feeling lonely or depressed or just not happy. A good relationship, you’re having more good days than bad days. That’s a big thing. I’ll ask my client, whether it’s an individual or a couple, “Do you feel like you have more better days and happy days than sad days and with fighting?” That sometimes is something that will catapult them into realizing, “Wow, I didn’t even realize that it was that bad.” So fun, trust, obviously, trusting your intuition, trusting each other. I can go on and on.